Female white-collar workers organized a group to celebrate the New Year in Lhasa to avoid urging marriage： it was like escaping from a cage.

This Spring Festival in 2018, Liu Mingzhu, who usually works in Beijing, did not return to his hometown, but spent it in Lhasa. She was not with her family, but with two female friends of the same age, and nine donkey friends contacted on the Internet.

On the afternoon of New Year’s Eve, Liu Mingzhu and his party arrived in Lhasa at an altitude of more than 3,000 meters by 38-hour train. The sunshine in Lhasa at 6 o’clock in the afternoon was still strong, and the excitement of the three people even made them forget the dizziness caused by altitude sickness. When they saw the mountains opposite the railway station, they whispered "Lhasa, I am coming".

For 28-year-old Liu Mingzhu, arriving in Lhasa is like escaping from a cage. The pressure of urging marriage makes it difficult for her to return home. Now, after the New Year, Liu Mingzhu has returned to Beijing, and life remains the same.

Leave home for the New Year to avoid the pressure of urging marriage.

In December 2017, Liu Mingzhu’s sister-in-law gave birth to a baby, and she returned to her hometown in Henan from Beijing. On the second day after the banquet, my parents quarreled at the dinner table. The focus of their argument was why she didn’t have a boyfriend at the age of 28.

Liu Mingzhu’s younger brother and sister almost all got married just after the legal age, and both got married by blind date when they returned home during the Spring Festival. Now that my brother and sister have children, the focus of the family naturally falls on the "older sister".

Liu Mingzhu’s previous growth process once met all the expectations of rural parents for their children: excellent academic performance, admission to prestigious schools, graduate studies, and staying in Beijing after graduation. But now, Liu Mingzhu is out of the expectation of her parents at this stage of marriage.

Although Liu Mingzhu only lived in his hometown for a few days at the end of last year, his parents took separate actions. Liu’s father dug out the paper phone book and called his friends one by one, asking them to worry about their daughter’s marriage with shyness and embarrassment. Liu’s mother went to her neighbor’s house, pretending to ask others casually if there were any young men of the right age who could be introduced to her daughter.

The parents’ performance doubled the pressure on Liu Mingzhu. When she told her friends about her experience of being forced to get married at home, she received the same feedback. "It turns out that this happened not only to me." Liu Mingzhu said. Thinking of the upcoming Spring Festival, I may face a lot of embarrassment after returning home. Several friends who were urged to get married hit it off and decided to go to Lhasa for the New Year in order to escape the marriage.

Elders often arrange blind dates during the Spring Festival.

Liu Mingzhu’s two friends are sisters. Sister Xu Lan is 29 years old and sister Qing Xu is 28 years old. They also suffered from their parents’ urging to get married.

The two sisters’ plan to go to Lhasa during the Spring Festival was opposed by their parents. Two days before the departure, the family started a cold war for this, but the two sisters did not compromise. "This is a trip that goes away." Xu Lan works in her hometown and gets along with her parents every day. In her opinion, the Spring Festival is not a reason to be with her family.

In the hometown of the Xu sisters, during the Spring Festival, there is a fixed meeting place in the town. In a few days near the end of the year, interested parents will take their children there for blind date. In order to avoid embarrassment, many people bought and sold things at the rally in those days, taking the opportunity to chat with others about their family background, work, personality, etc., and then entrusted the matchmaker to act as matchmaker.

In order to avoid blind date, Xu Lan tried to avoid it by various excuses, while her parents always attributed her refusal to "too high a vision". Once, my father was drunk and talked to her. He earnestly advised her to lower her eyes and asked her daughter to "evaluate her own conditions".

Despite her elder sister’s support, Qing Xu, who is currently working as an intern in Beijing, is constantly told by her parents that she wants to find a boyfriend to get married early. Regarding the criteria for choosing a spouse, the two sisters and their families have had numerous disputes. Their parents said that they could not see the situation clearly and they were distressed that their parents did not understand themselves. "I still have time and energy to fight with my family. I don’t want to go against my own ideas." Xu Lan didn’t disclose her specific thoughts. She felt that age was not a weapon for her to compromise.

Everest base camp meets a couple to propose marriage

In addition to Liu Mingzhu and his party, there are nine other donkey friends on this trip to Tibet. They joined the team through a post posted by Liu Mingzhu, and all 12 of them were single young men and women.

Yang Peng is the only child in his family. Born in 1991, he has no girlfriend. Parents have helped him find several girls at home, just waiting for him to have a blind date during the Spring Festival holiday. Yang Peng struggled for a long time before leaving, and finally made up his mind to escape from home and choose to travel for the New Year.

On the day of departure on February 18th, Liu Mingzhu finally chose to stay in Lhasa because of the serious rebellion. In the WeChat group they formed, teammates kept sending her beautiful scenery on the road, but her high reaction has not been completely eliminated. Although it is regrettable, her heart is insufficient. "I really wanted to go to a higher place, but after the driver knew the situation, I was not allowed to get on the bus first, and then I just sat on it, but the driver drove the car directly to the hospital and let me get off there."

On February 20, teammates arrived at Everest base camp. During the break, these single men and women who want to escape the urge to marry saw an unexpected scene: the boy took out his ring and knelt down to propose to the girl. Qing Xu captured a complete video and sent it to Liu Mingzhu, where the onlookers cheered.

After watching the video, Liu Mingzhu returned a message to his teammates: "I didn’t expect that even if I walked to the roof of the world, I couldn’t escape the crit of dog food."

On February 21st, a group of people who ended the tour around Mount Everest shared anecdotes on the road in the group. Some people asked whether they should continue to leave during the Spring Festival next year, and many people raised their hands to respond. To Liu Mingzhu’s surprise, several pairs of people on this train became lovers. "Everyone seems to believe that they will get a chance to find the other half when they come here. Many people start to know each other’s situation on the station wagon, especially when some girls have altitude sickness. At this time, interested boys will take care of them wholeheartedly."

Recently, Liu Mingzhu also returned to Beijing. Although he failed to complete the tourism project as planned, Liu Mingzhu thought that he had figured out many things in Tibet. "I will still stick to my own standards in choosing a boyfriend, but I will also communicate with my family to reassure them."

(The interviewees in this article are all pseudonyms)